The other side of 180 degrees
Change is good.
We all have weaknesses. This is fantastic. It lets us know how much more we can grow. Our deficiencies are an indication of what we cannot do on our own. It gives us a good indication of why we have not experienced total freedom or breakthrough. It gives us great reasons to stay contrite and humble - even though we shouldn't really need many reasons.
Have you ever seen someone after a long time who lost a bunch of weight? The first thing you say is: "wow, you look like a different person!" The person they used to be physically is no longer there! It is an amazing thing. Trust me, I know this first-hand :-) Becoming a different person requires alot of change. It requires a shift in how you think, how you see the world, how willing you are to receive constructive criticism, and being flexible enough to being molded but stubborn enough to keep the essence of how you are. I have found change to being an interesting phenomenon.
Some of us change and become the opposite of who we were. We grew so disgusted with certain aspects of ourselves, that we literally worked hard with the grace of God to making that 180 degree shift. This is amazing. It is amazing that we can grow so fully - mature so well - and develop into a masterpiece.
But something happens quite often that is a result of this 180 degree change. Sometimes we overcompensate. We work so hard to change, that we overdo it - we go beyond what was necessary. This is the other side of 180 degrees. This is when we have "changed enough," but think we have to keep going. What happens when you pass 180 degrees? - you get towards 360 - what happens when you get to 360? - you get right back to where you started.
The passage between 181 and 360 is horrifying. It is worse than the challenges you faced getting to 180. There are good struggles. These are the hurdles that you know are necessary - are character building - that will produce fresh fruit in a dry place. We can sense these arduous moments in time. It is when we fight the good fight - and run with everlasting peace and confidence. Then, there are bad struggles. There are wrong fights. This is what I like to call the 181 degree challege. This is when we are going into places that we shouldn't venture into. This is where we try and prove ourselves.
Proving ourselves is tough. We have changed. But now we have to allow the world to see our change. When we try to make our change known, we get into the 181st degree. We do things that make us like who we used to be. We act out. We fight to show that our change is real. Anytime you try to show that something is authentic, it becomes artificial - it goes back to zero - what's worse is that it can go back to 360. Getting to 360 degrees is not good, because it's harder to get back to 180 than it was when you were at 0. Reverting back to that "changed state" is tough because you experienced damaging fights - unecessary turmoil - unwarranted mountains.
Change is fantastic. But it has to be for yourself. It is a personal thing. People who change for the sake of others never authentically change. Change is a heart issue. It is a renewal of your mind. It is a freeing of your spirit. Change requires no acknowledgement. Change asks for no approval. Change is a function of your will - your desire - your love. May we inspire each other to make 180 degree shifts in our life. May we become unrecongnizable to our sin, to our weaknesses, to our folly, to our greed. May we never require each other to prove anything - but to only be fully ourselves, in the light of our love for each other, and in light of the One that beckons us towards 180.
There is a grace that can bring us back - back to where we belong. Peace, and much love to you - Jeevo.