Joy Runneth Dry

Desire vs. Obligation. Desire vs. Sacrifice. Desire vs. Righteousness. Desire vs. What is Right. Desire has many opponents these days. Desire is always fighting something. It seems to always be contradictory to what we really should do. Our desires cannot be trusted -- at least we seem to think so.

But I wonder if it is our desires that cannot be trusted, or everything else. What if we should be questioning the obligation, the sacrifice, the righteousness, and what is right? What if the things that compete against our desires are the things that our Maker is not satisfied with. We blame our poor desires, but all our desires want to do is make us happier - make us full of joy - make us full of love.

By no means am I saying that all our desires are correct - certainly not. However, I am constantly questioning whether what I want is what our Maker wants. We would love for His desires to be in us - but we know the imperfect rhythms of our heart - so we give plenty of weight to our "wrongness" or potential to be wrong.

At the end of the day, your heart is all you have. Sure - the heart is deceptive - but why drown out the only thing that beats in your entire body. I would rather go with my imperfect heart than my imperfect logic. I would rather lean on my heart's understanding because my heart is willing to be changed - maneuvered - held - and transformed. But my mind is not so malleable. My logic will always be my logic. If I feed my logic, I will get used to drowning out the most malleable and powerful thing I have - my heart.

We have to be true to our heart's greatest desires. We have to be willing to throw logic out the door when our heart starts pulsating.

"Don't use your brain in the places where your heart goes" --G-Vo (Respect, "Wasn't Supposed to be this Way")

My lyrics speak to me - never in real time - but always in the future. Sometimes I build up the nerve to actually listen to my music in the car. I cringe at every song, but something special happens after the initial shock of realizing that I actually decided to record my mediocre voice for thousands of ears. My lyrics seems to have been for me in those very moments. My prophetic self that wrote them in the past seems to have wrote it for 3 or 4 years later - at that very moment when it pierces my heart.

God defines what is pleasing to Him - and He does this through our desires - He does it through our Heart. Our job is to follow it - follow the Heart well. When you follow something well, you are willing to admit when it is wrong. But you are willing to follow it with true integrity. When you drown out your heart, you start living to your own tune - you becomes less willing to correct yourself - and you decide what is more righteous based on social norms, past experiences, and static principles.

Your joy will never run dry, because you are destined to be in the rivers of your own desires - His desires - peace, and much love to you - John Baptist!


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